Why I Make Records
We're almost a month into the release of my new project, LOVE WAS HERE FIRST, and I am having the great fun of hearing how people are interacting with the music. In this hyper-connected world of Facebook, Twitter, Blogs and email, there is much more immediate and direct contact with the folks who listen to my songs, and it's truly a blast to hear their reactions in close to real time. So thanks to each one of you who has taken the time to share your response ... and to those of you who haven't: What do you think? Huh? Huh?
I'm laughing, but I'm serious ...
Anyway, today I came across a blog I wrote over at Conversantlife over a year ago (September 3, 2008) when I had just begun recording this project. (Why the project took over a year to make is a long story I've shared elsewhere.) It's a piece exploring the reasons to even keep recording CDs in a topsy turvy music market. I was surprised to rediscover it as I don't remember writing it. But I sure remember feeling it, and I feel it still. So I thought I'd share the blog here.
CDs and Books and Massive Anxiety Attacks, Oh My
September 3, 2008, 10:53 am » Carolyn Arends
There is a lot of talk these days about the perilious future of both recorded music and book publishing. As a recording artist and author, I furrow my brow in the general direction of both topics. I was intriguiged by this recent article by music journalist Chet Flippo. He refers to a "massive anxiety attack" that has plagued the music industry for some time and discusses specifically his concerns that commercial uncertainty is breeding an artistic insecurity that is robbing recording artists of their "mojo". (I think one can draw some parallels to what is happening to many authors in the world of book publishing as well.)
I just began recording my 10th CD in August, and I have difficulty giving a solid business rationale for the undertaking. Digital distribution models (both of the legal and pirate variety) have radically changed the income potential for artists, which is a nice way of saying I won't make very much money. And my plans to record songs that would fit neatly in the direction my speaking and touring career has been going were all shot to bits when a passle of new songs literally showed up and wrestled me to the ground -- songs that remind me of a line from an old Mark Heard song: "I'm too sacred for the sinners, and the saints wish I would leave."
So what am I doing? Why am I doing it?
The other day an acquaintance asked me (in a non-threatening, interested way) what my objectives were for the new recording I was working on. And I hemmed and hawed for a bit and then finally told the truth.
I want to sing honest songs. I want this cd to be better than the last one--a deeper pocket or a sweeter line. I want to record some bit of something that gives me and maybe someone else goosebumps. I want to be moved, and to move someone else.
Like most artists who are also Christians, I walk a fine line between calling and indulgence; I could not honestly tell you the ratio between flesh and spirit at any given moment. But this is what I know. We must all tell our stories, as truthfully and as beautifully as we can, and God is such a good God He can and will use our efforts. I've seen it more times than I can count. And I don't know if that gives me mojo, but it gives me motiviation. And I can't wait for the next recording day.
I think the Flippo article reaches a pretty fine conclusion:
"So what can we as individuals do? I try to follow the advice of my high school Latin teacher, who I have increasingly realized was a very wise woman. 'Just tend to your own garden," she would say. "If we all do that, things cannot help but get better.'"
I don't know the future of recorded music or book publishing or painting or sculpture or theatre. But if we tell our stories, as honestly and beautifully as we can, things can't help but get better.
CA
Comments
Love was Here First
I posted a comment above before I actually had the CD. I received it for Christmas and now have more to say.
This is my favorite of CD yours since Feel Free. Musically, the upbeat songs are fun and many of the slower songs are beautiful.
Generally, I like the horns on the album. It's a refreshing change. Be Still reminds just a little bit of the 70's, maybe Chicago - not so much as to feel dated, or feel like it's trying to mimic a certain sound, but I do like the horn section. And the horns on Something Out of Us are a lot of fun. The bouncy music on that song works very well with some of the humorous thoughts in they lyrics.
My Favourite Lie is also vary catchy, with an Irish or Scottish influence that I really like.
The slower songs have a nice melodic ranges, which keeps the interesting. Also, the high points in pitch and the tension in the songs correspond nicely to the tension and emphasis in the lyrics - which to me is an indicator of good songwriting. That is, the music matches the lyrics.
Willing, I Am A Soul, and Never Say Goodbye are probably my three favorite slower songs, but I like all the songs on the album.
Lyrically, there are multiple interesting comments. I can't mention all the clever ideas expressed, but a few stand out in my mind.
The whole idea of My Favorite Lie makes a lot of sense to me. At my church, I've taken classes that try to help us know how we should serve God. These classes explore our natural talents and also our spiritual gifts, guiding us to identify those parts of ourselves that God intended to use for his purpose. I think there is some truth in those classes, but there is a danger as well. The danger is that Scripture is very clear that we must "die". It is when we are weak that we are strong. Moses was not a great speaker and, from what I can tell, neither was Paul. Yet God called them both to be great leaders and speak to men.
It can be at those times when God is calling me to do something that scares me that I can make the claim, "That's not who I am - I'm not comfortable doing that, so it must not be God that is calling me." And I can dream dreams of how I might serve God by employing my natural talents and doing those things that come naturally to me. When I dream, I don't dream of pain. There is a lie there in my dreams, and it a lie that I hold close to me. Calling it a "favorite lie" makes a lot of sense to me. It's the lie that says I can love people and love God without going through pain. And to say "I am a sucker for my favorite lie" just drives the point home. I don't just fall for it once, but I'm thick enough to fall for it over and over.
In "Something Out of Us", we get the truth that, even though we're suckers for our favorite lies, God can still make something out of us. "Weak knees and stiff necks". Great juxtaposition. "Weakness" is sometimes a virtue, and persistence is necessary to seek God. But there's nothing good about "weak knees" and "stiff necks". That expresses in a clever way the bad side to both of the attributes of weakness and stubbornness.
"Willing" reminds me a lot of "The Pursuit of God" - a book by A.W. Tozer. At the end of the first chapter, Tozer writes a prayer for the reader to pray, and includes the phrase "I desire to desire". When I first read that prayer in college, it struck me hard. I didn't really feel a desire for follow God, but I wished I did. I couldn't pray with honesty, "I desire you, God", but I could honestly pray that "I desire to desire you, God." I believe God does answer those prayers, and I believe my desire for God has grown. This is the very same sentiment I hear in the words from this song: "I am willing to be willing, I am ready to be to be moved. I am longing for the longing that pulls me close to you."
I love the phrase "original grace" from the song The Last Word. In I Peter, it says, "...Christ, a lamb without blemish or defect. He was chosen before the creation of the world, but was revealed in these last times for your sake." To me, that says that God, as he considered just how he would create the world, knew that people would sin and knew that they would need a sacrifice that they couldn't afford. So, before he created anything, he chose Christ as a lamb that would pay for the sins of the people who would rebel from him in the world he was about to create. Obviously, we're accustomed to hearing the phrase "original sin", but it is true that the grace, and the love, was here first.
I made some commments in a previous post about "According to Plan". There is an implication in this song, and it seemed to be confirmed in your comments from one of your interviews, that God is reactionary in his actions. We do something, and then he redeems it. I understand the dilemma - trying to hold onto two distinct truths: 1) That we have freedom and 2) That God maintains control. I don't claim to understand exactly how all this works, so I'm not overly bothered when you try to express your own understanding of how God makes this all work. But I do think that God is both proactive and reactive, and the nothing happens that he didn't allow and had full power to prevent. Maybe the one exception is our sins - I don't think he steps in to prevent those, but I do think he has full power to alter the results of our sins.
Many other clever lines and turns of a phrase are on this CD and I've enjoyed it very much. It is true that Christ never said goodbye. I'm not sure that I ever had that pointed out before. "Never Say Goodbye" is a cool song which does just that, and it's a nice way to end the CD.
Thanks for sharing your heart and thoughts with us, and putting them to music that keeps our attention and pleases us even as we're figuring out what it is you're saying.
thanks!
Reese,
Thx so much for the detailed and thoughtful response to the disc -- specific feedback is a real gift to me and I deeply appreciate it.
I'm also going to use the Tozer quote -- thanks!
Bad things just happen
First, let me confess that I don't have the new CD yet. I'm anxious to get it, but I also have a tough time figuring out gifts for my family to get me. So, I'm putting this on my Christmas list.
Regardless, I'm still perplexed by the statement you made saying "Sometimes bad things just happen" in explaining the song "According to Plan".
It seems to contradict other statements you make regarding God's sovereignty. That is, in other places you seem to say something like this: "Sometimes God allows bad things to happen."
To me, the difference between those two statements is very significant.
I'm not going to belabor this point, but I am curious to know which of those two statements most accurately reflects your current thinking.
I would think it would impact your understanding of verses in the Bible that say things like
- all things happen for the good of those that love the Lord
- God prepares good works in advance for us to do
- God chose Jesus as the sacrificial lamb before he even created the world
- not even a sparrow falls to the ground apart from the will of God